Beauty Bittersweet

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""Pretty? Oh, pretty doesn't seem the right word to use. Nor beautiful, either. They don't go far enough. Oh, it was wonderful--wonderful. It's the first thing I ever saw that couldn't be improved upon by imagination. It just satisfies me here' --she put one hand on her breast-- 'it made a queer funny ache and yet it was a pleasant ache.'" ~ Anne Shirley, Anne of Green Gables

***

Do you ever feel a queer, exquisite pain when you see something truly lovely? I do. I'll see the sun shining through the trees, or the lights of Portland shining on the river at night, and the sudden rush of joy I feel will be mingled with what Anne very aptly described as an ache. Now, why do you suppose that is? Why should the sight of something so beautiful give me pain?

Perhaps it's the knowledge of the transience of the moment. The sun moves, light shifts and fades, trees are felled, morning dawns, and the mystery of night slips away. The beauty of an instant is shadowed by a consciousness that the moment will soon be gone.

I think this may be a part of it. But I tend to think that another part of it stems from a feeling that I am unable to fully appreciate what I am seeing. I cherish the hope that when the distractions of the flesh are gone, I shall be able to appreciate truth and beauty in a way that I never can in this fallen world.

Someday this world will be renewed. The beauty we see here on earth is just a shadow of the wondrous land to come. Those who have placed their faith in Christ shall be renewed, too. And with unclouded eyes we shall behold creation as it was meant to be.

I can't wait.

September

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I hope you were out in the mellow light

Between evening and afternoon.

I hope there was not much else on your mind

Except that the sky is blue.

I hope you stood for a moment there

With the breath of fall on your arms

I hope you breathed in the golden air

And carried with you its charms.

Just Being A Girl

1. I have a new pair of high-heels, and I love them. They are black with a suede finish and they have a strap across the instep. See the picture? That's what they look like. I call my new high heels Bonnie and Clyde. I have never seen the movie Bonnie and Clyde, but I know it's set in the 1930s and these shoes remind me of that era. I have broken the heels in successfully, which means that they don't hurt me WHILE I'm wearing them, only AFTERwards. -- High-heels, I might add, are bad for you. Even when mine fit perfectly, as Bonnie and Clyde do, they still hurt my calves and my back after I wear them for too long. Why do I wear them for too long? As Louisa May Alcott self-deprecatingly said, "Dear me, let us be fashionable or die!"

Last night, I literally had a dream that the suede finish rubbed off my shoes and they were ruined. O.O I didn't know my subconscious was that preoccupied with my shoes, but apparently it is. It was a terrible dream. When I woke up this morning, I had forgotten about the dream, and I didn't remember it till I went downstairs to put on the black high heels. Then it all came back and I thought, "HEY! MY SHOES AREN'T RUINED." Such a good start to the day.

2. Am I the only one who gets dressed up for church, comes home, and then feels despondent because I have to change back into ordinary clothes? Sometimes it's so depressing that I DON'T change back into ordinary clothes. Granted,  I took off the heels. But I still have on my skirt and my nice white cardigan. I feel so gloriously domestic, sashaying around the kitchen with an apron over my nice clothes, doing dishes and cooking eggs for lunch while singing Brandon Heath, The Mowglies, and songs from the new Annie soundtrack. It just wouldn't be as much fun if I were wearing jeans and a t-shirt.

3. Okay, so I wasn't a HUGE fan of the new Cinderella movie, but I did like the incorporation of the song "Lavender's Blue" (good call, Kenneth Branagh and Patrick Doyle). And I was wondering how such a sweet song could have a faintly haunting quality when Lily James was singing it a cappella. I say WAS wondering, because I'm not wondering anymore. I figured it out O.O. It's because the first two notes of the song are a fifth. Fifths are unresolved. It takes the addition of the third to make a chord either major or minor. And, obviously, there is no third when you're singing it a cappella with no accompaniment! So the melody comes off as neither major nor minor, but soooomeeething in betweeeeen. Hence the haunting quality. 

Ahhhhhh. You have no idea how excited this makes me. I loooooove unresolved chords. *waltzes around singing* Lavender's blue, dilly dilly, Lavender's green ...

Also, just so you know. I knew that song BEFORE the movie came out. *drops microphone*

Right. That's all for today. Tootles, kids! *eats string cheese*

Just when I was afraid no one needed me anymore,

You asked for my help.

Just when I thought I'd be left behind again,

You begged me to come along.

I prepared to go back into my shell,

But you asked me to come out.

I resigned myself to loneliness,

But you made me laugh.

It's going to be different, that's for sure.

 But that doesn't mean it won't be all right.

Thanks to you.

love, Emily

When You Can't Have It, Draw It

Here's a dress I drew tonight :). I was inspired by Treksie's drawings to try to get the folds of fabric on clothing right. I drew this one from a reference picture for practice.

And, here! Romantic song to go with romantic dress. Ahhh. The bridge. So beautiful. *swoooonn*

Story Writing Challenge!

I don't know WHY I'm doing this right now, just when school is starting back up. Of course, I did school all summer, and I'm halfway through my August term, so it's nothing new for me. But I suppose that YOU all are toiling over snowdrifts of papers with math proofs and essays and notes for upcoming tests scribbled all over them. So I'm sure you'll have plenty of time to participate in this story writing challenge!!!!

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Just to make things fun, your story must include all of these 5 elements:

1. A basket of cookies
2. A character who can breath fire
3. An object that can talk (say, a clock, a sword, a carousel horse)
4. A death scene
5. The word "lugubrious," because I like it.

Yes. All those things. Also, your story does not have to be long! 2 or 3 pages of story is nothing to sneeze at (as long as it's not double spaced O.O). Either share your story with me on Google+, or post it in the comments box (trusting it will fit :P), or post it on your own blog. I'll be posting mine here within a week or so, and I'll do an illustration for it, too! Eee! So excited. Can't wait to see what you all come up with. Happy writing!!!!

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Mumford and Sons and Company: My Favorite Lyricists

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Okay. I am an extremely words-oriented person. And I also love music. So songs with lyrics are potentially the greatest things in the world as far as I'm concerned. I'm always terribly happy to stumble accross an artist who combines good music with strong, unique lyrics. Here are a few of my favorite wordsmiths. 

1. Adam Young

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I love his lyrics, particularly in the albums All Things Bright And Beautiful, Maybe I'm Dreaming, and Ocean Eyes (which is just about my favorite album in the world). His lush lyrics evoke mental images saturated with color. Apart from the frequent occurence of the word blue, he employs a wide vocabulary, which is always refreshing. Charmingly enough, he positively puns; the endless wordplay and the playful use of colloquialisms from many different decades give his lyrics a tone that is quaint and sly by turns. Plus, bonus: the content of his songs is remarkably clean in this degenerate day and age. I am sorry to say that he is the only secular lyricist that I can recommend across the board; just goes to show how awesome he is.

Favorite lyric: Oh, gosh, I can't pick favorites. But I do like this one from "Technicolor Phase":

I am the black in the books, the letters on the pages that you memorize

And I am the orange in the overcast, a color that you visualize

2. Mumford and Sons 

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Fun fact: Did you know Marcus Mumford's parents are the national leaders of the Vineyard church in the UK and Ireland? Explains a lot, doesn't it? I love the sparse, simple, yet deep and inscrutable lyrics that Mumford writes. There's a sort of raw quality to his songs. He mixes good, strong verbs with ... well, earthy metaphors, but earthy as in references to nature, not earthy in the sense of bawdy and vulgar. His vocabulary leans on the archaic side; I rather fancy this is the result of his exposure to the Bible and other old sources. He quotes Shakespeare in his lyrics, you know. For heaven's sake, his first album is entitled Sigh No More, which is in itSELF a quote from Shakespeare's Much Ado About Nothing. Pretty awesome, right? (I like Shakespeare.) I can recommend the tracks "Sigh No More" (the song, not the whole album unfortunately), "Awake My Soul" (ahhhh love that song, so gud), "Roll Away Your Stone," "Dust Bowl Dance," annnnnd I suppose "The Cave," although that song doesn't really do for me what the other songs on the album do. -- Never listened to Babel, by the way. I didn't particularly like the singles from it I heard played on the radio, and didn't bother to look into it further. I should, one of these days, though ... it may very well be good ...

Favorite Lyric: Usually this verse from "Awake My Soul":

Lend me your hand and we'll conquer them all
But lend me your heart and I'll just let you fall
Lend me your eyes, I can change what you see
But your soul you must keep totally free

3. Ben Gibbard

... okay, I could seriously not find a good picture of him. It's all his fault. He just stares blankly at the camera.

Ben Gibbard is a master poet, with a vast vocabulary and flexible sense of meter. I always read his lyrics before I listen to the songs, and when I read them, the meter is almost perceptible: I can rarely tell which words are supposed to rhyme. Then I listen to the song, and rhymes appear out of nowhere. Magical, really. I can scarcely pin down what it is about his lyrics that entrances me so much. I guess it's the very concrete nouns and precise language communicating abstract ideas of love and sorrow. For instance, take this verse from his song "Title and Registration":

The glove compartment is innacurately named
And everybody knows it
So I'm proposing a swift orderly change
Cause behind it's door
There's nothing to keep my fingers warm
And all I find
Are souvenirs from better times

Like that. I don't know, I just love it. I can recommend the tracks "Soul Meets Body," "Title and Registration," "Different Names for the Same Thing," and, especially this one, "Transatlantacism" (the song, not the album).

Favorite Lyric: Well, of course the lyric "Brown Eyes, I'll hold you near / Cause you're the only song I want to hear" -- which I just find so sweet, nobody says nice things about brown eyes, everybody's going on about the blue ones and the green ones! -- but aside from that one, I luuuuuuv the whole of the song Transatlantacism. Here's just the first verse.

The Atlantic was born today, and I'll tell you how

The clouds above opened up and let it out

I was standing on the surface of a perforated sphere when the water filled every hole

And thousands upon thousands made an ocean making islands where no islands should go

Oh, no

Ah. You'll just have to listen to it to find out what happens next.

4. Robert Robinson

Evidently, he wrote "Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing" at age 22. If that's not awesome, I don't know what is.

Oh to grace how great a debtor

Daily I'm constrained to be!

Let Thy goodness, like a fetter, 

Bind my wandering heart to Thee:

Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it,

Prone to leave the God I love;

Here's my heart, O take and seal it,

Seal it for thy courts above

5. Whoever wrote "Be Thou My Vision"

I don't know who it was for sure, and neither does Wikipedia, but whoever he or she was, I'm a fan.

Riches I heed not, nor man's empty praise

Thou mine inheritance, now and always;

Thou and thou only, first in my heart,

High King of heaven, my treasure thou art.

So, yes, there you have it, some of my favorite lyrics and lyricists. What are some of yours? Do tell! I'm ripe for some new songs :).

AIEEEEEE!!! WE GOT CHICKENS!!!

Aren't they beautiful. They are four days old (except two of them which are two days old) and are settling into their new home. We got all different kinds, which certainly makes it easier to tell them apart. Good thing, too, because we wanted to name them. We got two Ameraucanas, one Rhode Island Red, two Buff Orpingtons, one White Leghorn, one Barred Plymouth Rock, one Silver-Laced Wyandotte, and one Red Star: nine in all. 

This one's mine, Arrietty the Buff Orpington. Like all the Buffs, she's a mellow, easy-going bird, which is why I picked her. She's a strawberry blonde right now, but when she grows up she will be a proper ginger, like this:

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Everybody else in the family got one chicken, too, and Mom got us one extra in case one of them DIES :P. For the longest time, we just called her "The Extra." She belongs to all of us generally, I suppose, but I guess she will officially become the hen of whoever is the first to lose theirs. Oh, and we also got her in case one of our "hens" turns out to be a cockerel. There was a sign above the chicks at the store that read "90% ACCURACY IN SEX DETERMINATION." So, yeah, one of our chicks might very well turn out to be a guy, and in THAT case we shall have to get rid of it. We live in the suburbs, and we don't want a rooster crowing and waking up all the neighbors ... or us, for that matter.

So, yeah! Chickens now, in our garage! Which one is your favorite? If it were not for my loyalty to Arrietty, I would like Hannah's Ameraucana best. It's the little dark brown one you see in the first picture. Her name is Celesteabellbethabell, Celeste for short. But mine is pretty cute too.

Once upon a time, I used to be able to write without emoticons. 

Come to think of it, I suppose I still can. In the stories I write, my sentences aren't dotted with smiley faces, frowney faces, tongue-sticking-out faces, and so on. Don't believe me? I call to witness the chapter of The Princess and The Blacksmith that I posted on this blog a while back! No emoticons in that! Gosh, I really need to write the next chapter :P ... 

AHA. YOU SEE. AN EMOTICON. OBSERVE HOW EASILY IT SLIPS IN. Oh yeah, this, THIS is where the emoticons insert themselves: when I'm just TALKING. Say in letters, or emails, a blogpost, or on Google chat or whatever. I always use emoticons.

I know why I do it. The person I'm talking or writing to can't see me or hear me, and I can't show them through facial expressions or the tone of my voice how I am feeling. So I resort to emoticons. I guess you could say this is a good excuse, but really it's just laziness. "A picture is worth a thousand words," you know, and it's just faster to say, "Cool! :D" instead of "That sounds amazing! I'm happy for you." 

The problem is, if you use emoticons, they can be misinterpreted. For instance, I've heard of multiple uses for the :P emoticon. Is it a foot-in-mouth emoticon, or a tongue-sticking-out emoticon, or what? And either way, what emotion does it convey? And I'm sure there are several meanings associated with other emoticons, too. So, to avoid being misconstrued, I'm going to write out several of the most common emoticons I use, and what I mean by them. I'll start with the smiley faces ... because yes, there are more than one. 

:D
The waitress smile. It's big and bright, but it also denotes a little restraint, a little formality. Friendly, yes, but professional.

XD
The BIG smile. Picture me grinning so hard that my eyes squeeze shut. I use this when I think something is funny, or when I'm really happy. When I use several D's after the X, that means I'm really REALLY happy. As in, "AAAAIIIIIEEEEE I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE YOU TOMORROW XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD." That sort of thing.

:)
This smile has a couple different uses (how's THAT for confusing). Sometimes I use it in place of the waitress smile when I don't want to come off as TOO perky or friendly. I mean, don't want to SCARE people *nervous laugh.* At other times, it functions as a "feelin' it" smile: it's quiet, genuine, empathetic.

8D
The annoying smile. My eyes are big, and my mouth is wide open. I use this when I'm teasing someone, or when I'm over-dramatising something in an attempt to be funny.

... so much for the smiles. Onto the miscellaneous expressions.

T.T
The "seriously?" face. Used more often for comedic effect rather than to convey real chagrin. This is the sort of face you'd get if you told me, "I don't like Owl City." What even, bruh. What is wrong with you.

o.O
The alarmed, disconcerted, or incredulous face. Used in "Y-y-you ate RAW SQUID?" situations.

O.O
The shocked face. I may be shocked in a good way, such as "YOU SAW TOM HIDDLESTON AT THE SUPERMARKET?!?" Or I may be shocked in a bad way. "TOM HIDDLESTON ISN'T GOING TO PLAY LOKI IN THE NEXT MARVEL MOVIE?!?" All depends on the context.

:P
Hm. I should really use the :T face instead of the :P face for the connotations that I associate with this emoticon. Instead of looking at it as someone sticking their tongue out ... which I think this face teeeecchnically indicates? ... I kinda visualize someone twisting their mouth to the side in an apprehensive or apologetic sort of way. It's sort of a "whoops" face, or an "oh, no" face. So, yeah: sometimes it's apologetic, sometimes it's apprehensive. But I don't stick my tongue out when I'm apologetic or apprehensive. WHO SAID THESE HAD TO BE LOGICAL?

XP
This one indicates extreme disgust. As in "Go camping for five days with no access to a shower? Hahahaha no."

... and then, of course, there's the sad faces, :(, :'(, etc. I don't particularly like the sad faces. They're not ... SAD enough. So I rarely use them. More often I just say something like *weeps*, *cries*, *sobs grotesquely*. Yeah. I really don't like the sad faces.

So, there you have it. My extensive, but by no means exhaustive, emoticon chart. How about you? What emoticons do you use, and what do you mean by them? Do you use any of the same emoticons I do but mean something completely different by them? I wouldn't want to misconstrue your emoticons! :P XD. Post your answer in the comment box below.

XD

Morning, all! I thought it high time I posted some of my art on my blog, so here it is! I drew this for my friend for her birthday. She gets to be in Ravenclaw house, because she's just about the smartest gal I know! 

 Ah, Hogwarts clothes. Love them so much. This outfit was inspired by Cho Chang's ensemble in the fifth movie. Except Cho wears a button-up cardigan, while I made this one a pullover instead.

By the way, which Hogwarts house do you think you are in? I used to think Slytherin for me, but now I'm not so sure. I might be Ravenclaw. How about you? Send your answer via your owl, or just post a reply in the comments box below ...

Mischief managed.